Monday, August 19, 2013

Diamonds Suck

Dear Men,

Have you been watching the T.V. lately? Nope, not the sports and movie channels. You have got to try watching the daily soaps or regional movies? Have YOU been paying attention?

Did you notice that the number of TV commercials (and Print too!) that say that "DIAMONDS ARE THE THAANG" have gone up by atleast 80% (of course, that is a number I just made-up now). Did you notice that every major gold reseller has now a totally different advertisement for their Diamonds collection too? And that the frequency of these commercials are increasing too?

How do you NOT see a pattern here?

Born in Kerala, I can always claim that I have seen and heard more about Gold than any other being in India. So in between a movie, if a Malabar Gold commercial is followed by Kalyan Jewellers one, followed by one of the Alukkas (Joy, Jos, Francis, and what-nots) I am programmed to automatically swallow them all up without even flinching. But what grabbed my attention was when "Do visit our special Diamonds section" soon changed to "Now Open - Our Diamonds showroom in your city". WHAZZAT NOW???

Diamonds are nothing but a waste of money and there are scores of material (with plenty of reasons why) online to justify that. It was DeBeers, with absolutely awesome marketing skills (credit to them for that), that made a totally worthless piece of rock the pinnacle symbol of love. THAT'S IT - It was just shrewd marketing!

Kraft Foods' Oscar Mayer has shown us just that with this awesome commercial for their bacon. This is a must-must-must-watch to know how Diamonds are marketed to us.

Now that these Jewellery-Mafia (as I like to call them) are done drinking the blood of young 20-somethings in the west and that they are finally waking up, they have turned their focus on developing markets like ours where young 20-somethings want to copy everything that is done by the west despite seeing where it has led them.
So, the next time your girlfriend demands a Diamond when you propose, dump her ass and get the hell outta there, cos' you definitely don't deserve someone so dumb when you make bigger decisions later on in life.
Dear Ladies,
News Flash - Diamonds are not your best friend.
That's right. They do not comfort you when you are down, they do not love you back, and c'mon they can't even fetch the newspaper.
You are merely being fooled by these major corporations into believing that you need a big worthless piece of rock on your finger to prove his love for you when he says - "I will love you for the rest of our lives together."
Nope! You do not need that! You need a man who is sensible enough to pay that money into his pending education loan, puts it into his piggy bank labeled "Our Dream Home", or maybe even buys a Washing Machine and says - "I promise to do all the laundry for the rest of our life together."
So, the next time your boyfriend shows up with a Diamond when he proposes, dump his ass and get the hell outta there, cos' you definitely don't deserve someone so dumb when you make bigger decisions later on in life.
Stay aware of what you see on T.V. Please do not get carried away.
- N
P.S. Has anyone heard of "moissanite"? Is it for real? Or is it the next Diamond-like scam?

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